I have been a dedicated smoker for almost 9 years and I think its time to quit.

Stopped at my regular 7 Eleven last night for a pack of cigs and when the $6.47 total rang up, my jaw dropped. Ugh, if I continue to smoke as much as I do, I'll be spending almost $200.00 a month. That's money that I could be putting away for a vacation, taking my boy to do fun things on the weekend, etc. Not to mention, my body will love me if I quit!  I can't even say how many doctors visits I've had to take care of respiratory problems in the last year.

I'm terrified of letting this addiction go. I was able to kick a drug habit, so one would think that this should be minor in comparison.

I need suggestions please! Anyone have some good ideas on how to help get me through this? How difficult was it for you to quit and were you successfull?

Whiskey at work

So, I'm a Xanga virgin.

At work (bored out of my fucking mind), I decided to see what it's all about. I came across a blog discussing the comparison between our "real life" boys and "Prince Charming" from romantic movies/novels. My thoughts took me through past relationships and the many difficult experiences I've had to go through to get where I am now.

I believe there are certain things that men & women alike should expect from a significant other.
Respect, honesty, affection, courtesy, an open mind, etc.

When I started dating, of course I knew nothing about how to have a relationship. So when things didn't turn out how expected, I was quick to place blame on everyone but myself. "He used me." "He left me." "It's his fault." What I couldn't see is that I was being treated with as much respect as I had for myself. None.

I had a habit of going from one unhealthy partner to another expecting a different result. Fucking insanity! My self worth and happiness were contingent on the man in my life. I excluded my family and friends to place sole responsibility on one person. Brilliant right? I wasn't able to see that I was a strong woman who could make it on my own.  It finally took the failure of three relationships, words that should've been left unsaid, many tears and unnecessary drama before the realization came that I was the one who needed to change. I could no longer place my entire life in the hands of anyone but myself. Drastic measures were seen in my near future.

Needless to say, 2008 was a year full of some arduous lessons.

The dating scene..gone. Sex life..non existent. Learning to love myself for the woman that I am on my own..PRICELESS. 

Unexpectedly, I crossed paths with someone quite intriguing. Had to have him..

The opportunity is now mine to experience what a healthy & giving relationship actually feels like. He possesses every quality that I could ask for in a companion. Now, we all know that every day isn't going to be easy in any relationship. There will be compromise from both parties. We'll see what time shall bring

Anywho, I'm a little tipsy and it's almost time to go home!

Love you bunches!!